Despondent to touch. “ I’ve hooked up with him, he has a giant cock” “ oh! I’ve hooked up with him too” My two girlfriends conversation as we get into our Uber black. This fills me with envy. You see I wish I enjoyed to be touched. To be care free, and have casual sex that is mutually enjoyable. I become hyper sensitive when I’m penetrated casually, and not in a good way. Each stroke moving in deeper feels like it’s pushing my undigested food up out of my belly. I hold it down so he doesn’t know of my disgust. The man on top of me looks like a foreign creature that I’ve never met, even though I may have thought I knew him before he was inside me. I can feel all of it, it feels like I’m losing a piece of myself, he’s taking it from me, the emptiness and self hatred expands inside of me as he releases his nut.















